Choices and Mistakes
by Birdie27
Summary: She was forced to leave. Then, she was forced to return. However, what she left and what she returned are two very different realities. So many small choices leading to so many big mistakes. Now, Kagome must clean up the mess, but only one person can help her.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or anything affiliated with Inuyasha.

**Chapter 1 - After **Naraku's Rise

Things were happening and she couldn't explain them. She felt like her reality was shifting. At first, it was just a strange breeze or an odd smell. Then, it was the weird tint of the sky or a bird that she had never seen. However, something happened the day of her high school graduation. Something shot right through her.

Her eyes snapped open as she sat up in bed. She sharply turned her head to her window. The sky was still dark, but she could see the sun just starting to peak in the distance. There was something comforting about being covered in the pre-dawn darkness. However, at that moment her breath was coming out in short pants.

"What the hell was that?" She whispered to herself.

Slowly, she moved the blankets and put her feet on the ground. She took a moment to try to feel something from her bed, but stood when she couldn't grasp it. She walked to her window and opened it. She leaned out into the fresh air and took a deep breath. There it was. She knew what she had felt, but she just couldn't believe.

"A...demon?"

Kagome took another shaky breath. She assumed, after she fell down the well, that there had been demons in this era all along and she just couldn't sense them. However, when she came back with training she still could not sense anything. She had been back home, permanently, for two years and constantly tried to stretch her powers out. She tried everyday to seek them out and now one was seeking her out. Its power alone shot through her as she slept.

She slammed the window shut as a shiver raced up her spine. She knew she needed to get some sleep, but she couldn't help herself. She pulled on dark blue skinny jeans and threw on a black v-neck. She threw her hair up and pulled on her shoes. She crept down her stairs like an intruder and out the back door. It was still dark and there was a slight chill in the air. She looked at the well house and couldn't deny that there was something odd hanging around it.

"Oh, stop it, Kagome!"

She stomped her foot and stormed toward the well. She wouldn't let two years away from the feudal era make her soft. She couldn't resist the small flutter in her stomach at the thought of seeing Inuyasha and her friends again. She pushed it away and focused on her task. She let her powers reach out. She was trying to find whatever it was that reached out to her. She certainly felt something in the well house.

She walked right up to it and threw the door open. She was met with darkness. Nothing. She sighed as she walked toward the well. She was going crazy. She leaned forward on her hands and looked into the dark depths of the well.

"Well, Kagome, you have finally become your Grandfather," she laughed at herself

She registered the spark a split second before she felt hands on her. Two strong hands grabbed her arms and held her painfully tight. She moved forward to get away, but she was trapped by the well. The body behind her just moved further into her. She couldn't even bring herself to scream. Her family would come running and then what? She shivered as she felt a mouth close in on her ear.

"It's about time," a whisper full of malice filled every inch of the well house.

Kagome cried out as she was picked up into the air by the back of her neck. Her hands went to the hand at her neck. She kicked her legs wildly as she felt herself being moved just above the well. She was desperately trying to turn and see who was holding her.

"Go and clean up your mess, girl."

She barely registered his words before she felt herself falling. She desperately reached out at the clawed hand that dropped her. She could already feel herself falling into the familiar light. She caught a glimpse of black clothing and red. Then, she felt the dirt under her feet and the clear sky above her head.

"Oh, no...Inuyasha is going to kill me," she sighed heavily.

She climbed out of the well, but the second she looked up she wanted to jump back down the well. The forest was gone. She could see scorched land, fallen trees, and not a single trace of green. Her eyes filled with tears as she took in the scene. Her feet moved her closer to what was once Inuyasha's forest and she noticed something terrifying. This damage was old, very old.

"What...," her words failed her.

Suddenly, she could hear feet pounding the earth. She looked up just in time to see a large group of people running in her direction. She just stood there starring like a fish. They all looked crazed with wide eyes, wild hair and odd weapons. She recognized some of them as people from the village, but none of their scared eyes even noticed her.

"Move!" A gruff shout turned her head.

She looked just in time to see a large man barreling through the crowd. However, she didn't react fast enough to avoid the hammer in his hands as he pushed into her. The force of the hit brought her to her knees. She tried to crawl back to well, but only managed to get stepped on. Slowly, her vision started to blur and she could feel herself slipping into the darkness. Her arms gave out and she crashed into the ground face first.

"Yasha," her broken whisper barely made it out before her eyes fell closed.

…...

Sesshomaru walked through the village with a look of disdain. These human villagers were pathetic. He had not even raised an eyebrow at them and they were running. It would seem that this uprising of demons was affecting the humans more than he thought. He almost wanted to laugh at them for the their weak, pathetic behavior.

His feet were leading him to Inuyasha's forest. He couldn't deny that the forest was a loss. Humans! One way or another they found a way to destroy nature. His brother never seemed to help things along.

He almost sighed to himself at the thought of his brother. However, just before his thoughts could stray, he saw something odd. The well was...glowing or at least it had been. Then, he saw a body lying a few feet away from it. It was obviously a woman, but he couldn't figure out the clothing. Something nagged at his memory, but he couldn't grasp it. He almost growled in frustration.

Suddenly, a moan escaped the body. He stopped right in front of it and bent over gracefully. He grabbed a hand full of black hair and lifted the woman's head. He raised one eyebrow as the memory came back to him. The miko. Inuyasha's wench had returned.

"A little late, girl."

He released her hair and didn't flinch as her head smacked back into the ground. She was not his problem, but he could not deny that she was powerful. Although her lack of training was appalling. He looked to the sky and noticed Naraku's minions were descending. He sighed as he reached down, roughly grabbing Kagome by the arm and threw her over his shoulder. He didn't even bother putting her over the shoulder without armor. She would make her pay for being such an inconvenience.

…...

Kagome's mind slowly fought to get back to the real world. She could feel a breeze and smell the forest. However, the more she awoke the more she regretted it. Pain. Pain was all she could think as she became more aware of her body. There were several areas on her person that were throbbing with pain.

Sesshomaru looked over as the girl started moaning and groaning. He almost regretted his rough handling of her. Perhaps, if he had been more gentle he would not have to listen to her complaints now.

Slowly, she rolled onto her back. Only then did she realize there were leaves and sticks sticking to her face and hair. She huffed as she tried to get the forest floor off of her face.

"Stop making a scene and get up," his frosty voice shot through her morning haze.

Kagome went stone still, her hands froze in her hair and her eyes were wide. That voice! She knew that voice and she knew the fear that came along with it. She let her head drop to one side and her eyes landed on him: Sesshomaru.

Her fear was satisfying, but short lived. Her body protested, but she sat up like a bolt of lightning. He could smell her shifting from fear to confusion and frustration.

"Sesshomaru..."

"Stating the obvious is doing nothing to help this situation."

She frowned at him, "What am I doing here and where is here?"

"How eloquent."

Her frown deepened and she was about to scream when he decided to actually be helpful.

"We are west, not far from my lands. I found you laying near the well," his voice was flat and uninterested.

"Okay...what happened here?"

He watched as she struggled to wrap her head around a single question.

"Naraku."

Her face fell and her heart stopped painfully in her chest. Naraku. What the hell happened?

"Enough. Get up. We have to get back to my dwelling."

"We?"

Her head was spinning and she felt herself quickly going back to the darkness she just awakened from.

"I will not repeat myself."

"Why am I going with you!?"

He almost grimaced at the sound of her yelling. He choose to take one large dangerous step toward her as she looked up at him with defiant eyes.

"If you do not get yourself up, then I will help you forcefully."

She looked up and she knew exactly who she was looking at. Kagome knew that he would kill her, or at the very least hurt her very badly, if she did not obey him. However, she couldn't seem to fully understand anything that was happening. All she really understood was the fact that she was NOT supposed to be going anywhere with Sesshomaru.

"Just leave me here. You don't even like me. I will find Inuyasha...ah!" She screamed out as his strong hand gripped her upper arm and pulled her painfully to her feet.

He squeezed her arm painfully as he pulled her small body closer. He put his face dangerously close to hers.

"I will break this arm if you do not listen to me. You WILL come with me. Inuyasha is dead."

Her entire body gave, pain forgotten, as his words sank in. Dead?

"What?" Her voice was far away and her eyes unfocused.

"Yes. The fool brought it upon himself. Now, let us proceed toward my home."

She stood unblinkingly. Sesshomaru gave her one last warning squeeze, but she didn't noticed. He looked down at her already bruised arm. Humans were entirely too fragile.

"Dead..."

He could smell the salt and he truly couldn't think of a single thing he'd rather do less than deal with a crying woman. Sesshomaru's hand connected with her jaw like lightning. He hit her hard enough to knock her, but was mindful about breaking her jaw. He caught her before her knees even gave out and once again slung her over his shoulder. This time he put her on the shoulder without armor.

…...

Her eyes opened and for a moment she had an overwhelming feeling of deja vu. She ached all over and she had no idea where she was. However, two observations alerted her to the fact that today was a new day. One, her jaw hurt. No, it didn't hurt, it was throbbing with sharp AND dull pain! Two, she was starring up at a wooden ceiling instead of trees and beneath her she felt something soft.

A moan escaped her lips as she turned onto her side. Yes, she was on a futon. Her heart started to speed up as she woke up more. Slowly, achingly she sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

"Where the hell am I?" She moaned again.

She looked around the room and noticed two sets of sliding doors. She could see the sun shinning through one set. She got to her feet and walked to the doors. She opened them and a courtyard was before her. Across the courtyard she could see what she assumed was the rest of the "house" she was in. She looked right and saw more rooms and the left was large wooden doors. She noticed a fountain in the center and two small gardens to the right and left. For a moment she debated walking across one of the small bridges connecting one side to another. However, she didn't have to make a move.

Suddenly, the doors across the courtyard opened and Sesshomaru walked out. She took an involuntary step back as his eyes landed on her. She didn't suppose it was too much to assume she was in Sesshomaru's house.

"Miko."

She barely heard his voice from across the courtyard. He did not have the same issue.

"Why am I here?"

"Hn. You do not remember yesterday," it was not a question.

Her hand came up and gently touched her jaw. She flinched at her own touch. Well, someone must have hit her!

"I believe I have you to thank for that," she growled.

"No. You have yourself to thank. Next time, learn the lesson the first time," his voice was cold and hard.

"Lesson!? You knocked me out!"

"I had no time for your emotional break down."

"Emoti...what?" Her voice lost its edge.

He resisted the urge to sigh. She had done this twice after the initial awakening. He should have hit her harder the first time. However, he did not and she woke up in a rather embarrassing state each time. He would smell confusion, fear, anger, then sadness. Then, of course, he would hit her again. Looking at her now he almost regretted it. There was a large, ugly bruise covering her jaw, lower lip and some of her cheek.

"Must we do this again."

"What...oh...oh no," her voice cracked.

And there it was. It hit her finally. He watched as she fell to her knees. Her hand covered her mouth just in time to soften the sob that broke through. He watched her with disinterest for a moment and then walked back into his room. He had no time for this. However, he would allow her to wallow in her self-pity. At least she could do it with some dignity and not for the world to see with him at her side.

She did not notice his absence. She couldn't wrap her mind around anything. Inuyasha was...dead? She remembered the stampede of village people near the well. She remembered what once was Inuyasha's forest. Naraku. He would stop at nothing to destroy this world; to destroy her world.

She crawled back to her futon and collapsed onto it. She curled into a ball on her side and just let herself cry. The tears were endless and hot. She didn't even noticed the loud sobs that left her mouth. All she could see was the first time she had ever seen Inuyasha. His handsome, peaceful face asleep as he was pinned to the tree. His beautiful white hair and his ears; she could still feel their familiar softness in her mind. Then, all she could see was the last time they ever spoke.

Sesshomaru could hear her from his study. He was very tempted to knock her out again, but thought better of it. She needed to get this out of the way so he could begin his work with her. The fool needed to be trained if she was going to help fix her mess.

**Authors Note**: THERE IT IS! My second fanfiction! I have no idea where I am going with this...well kind of, but not really. If there is anything my last fanficiton taught me it is the fact that these stories sometimes write themselves. It isn't always up to me lol I am really excited to be starting a new story!

I hope you liked and yes you are supposed to be a little confused/lost.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - There May Be Hope

Kagome opened her eyes and took in the darkness around her. Her face felt swollen and stiff. It took a moment, but she finally started noticing the ache in her head. She sat up rubbing her head and sighing.

"Crying yourself to sleep is never helpful," she whispered to herself.

She could tell it was dark out, but she had no idea what time it was. She sat up and took a big shaky breath. How could this have happened? She tried to understand how things could get this out of hand. No matter where her thoughts went they kept coming back to Inuyasha's words to her that day; her last day in this era.

"Kagome, this is for the best. I can't have you here...distracting me. I have to stop him!"

He sent her away! This was his idea and now look!

"Inuyasha, you idiot!" She couldn't help the words that left her mouth or the tears that followed.

He sighed to himself as he walked through his gardens. He heard the girl yelling at the air. She had been sleeping for practically three days now. He noticed her waking up only long enough to cry herself to sleep once more. Was this how all humans mourned or was she special?

He had told his servants to simply ignore the girl and go about their daily business. However, he had caught them several times sniffing at the door and one had almost opened the doors just to take a peak. Any fool could sense her power. Frankly, he was surprised his servants were willing to get so close to such a powerful miko. And emotionally unstable at that. However, it was her scent that drew them near. That scent! His entire home was being filled with the smell of the ocean, winter air, and something sweet that he couldn't name. He had never met a human with such an alluring scent. However, it was drenched in her depression. With another sigh and turned toward her room.

She couldn't seem to get her body to move. All she could do was sit there starring dumbly at the space in front of her. She just couldn't wrap her head around it. She heard something that could've been the doors opening, but didn't even bother looking.

"Are you done yet?"

Her only response was a small intake and release of breath.

"Pathetic."

His smooth voice filled her mind. She was thankful for something else to hear besides her own thoughts and memories.

"Why?" Her scratchy voice almost surprised him.

"You sit here crying for something you cannot change. You cry for a fool who brought death upon himself."

"No," she sighed, "Why did you bring me here?"

"You've left a mess behind you. You have the potential to clean it up."

Her face flushed in anger, "Excuse me? I left a mess!"

"Yes. You broke jewel did you not," his voice was calm and even.

"….Well..."

"Hn. And you left knowing that you were the only one who could sense the jewel or purify it for that matter?"

"Wha...NO! Kikyo is more than capable..."

"Well, she is dead too. The fact that you, or my brother, thought that Kikyo was an acceptable replacement is beyond me," his tone remained even, but now seemed bored.

Her eyebrow twitched, "That was Inuyasha's choice," she growled.

"And you always seemed so willing to do as you were told in the past," now his tone was dripping with sarcasm.

Her eyes went wide and then narrowed in anger. She stood up from the bed and stomped her foot in one fast motion.

"What the hell is your problem?!"

Before she could blink she was against the well. His claws were digging into her shoulder where he was holding her against the wall. He leaned down and put his face directly in front of her face.

"Lower your voice."

"You can't blame this all on me," she growled.

"Sharing blame will not lighten your load at this point."

"I know," she looked away sounding defeated.

"Hn."

She sighed, "It was never my intention to leave my duties behind."

Her scent was filling his head. Her eyes were really rather fair from this close. He shook his head of such thoughts and gave her one last push into the wall before letting go completely. He took a step back.

"Well, at any rate, you have training to do. Kikyo was no match for your natural ability, but she was very well trained."

"Must we keep talking about her," she mumbled.

He gave her a curious look, "Does her death not make you happy?"

Kagome's eyes went wide as she stared at him in horror and sharply said, "No."

His head tipped the other way, "Hm, odd."

They stood there in awkward silence. Kagome didn't know what to do or say. She stood there feeling Sesshomaru judging her. She hated him for it. He didn't know her or what she had gone through. He wasn't there that day with Inuyasha. It wasn't up to her!

"You will train."

She huffed lightly, "Yes."

"Good."

She stood there awkwardly once more. She was once again at a loss for words. She couldn't believe any of this. Yet, somehow, the fact that she was having a conversation with Sesshomaru was the most shocking part of it all. Suddenly, she felt the need to ask a question she already knew the answer to. She needed to fill the silence.

"How did they die?"

"In battle with Naraku. They were caught very much off guard."

She looked at the floor not willing to let Sesshomaru see what was happening to her. Inuyasha and Kikyo died together at the hands of the man who tore them apart and tormented them for so long. It was tragic and unfair. She hated it. Her eyes filled with the heartbreak and hate as her tears spilled over her lashes.

He could smell the salt and wanted nothing to do with it. He took a step back and turned his nose up at her. She really was a pathetically emotional creature.

"I will come for you tomorrow morning. Be done with this by then, miko."

She ignored him as she fell back to her side and closed her eyes. Before she could really wrap her mind around her pain she was asleep. Sesshomaru stood above her. He almost envied her or at least he would if it wasn't so disgusting. She so freely allowed herself to feel. Perhaps, this outpouring would expedite the whole mourning period. He sighed softly. He hoped as much.

…...

"Kagome, you can't stay here. You will die and I can't let that happen," his eyes were shadowed by his white bangs.

"Inuyasha, please! I can help you. You need me," she pleaded.

"No! I don't!"

She tried to hide her hurt at his words, "Liar."

His eyes finally snapped to her face as he harshly snapped, "NO! I don't!"

Her mouth fell open, but she couldn't find the words to say. He loved her! She knew he did, but now he was being so cruel! She watched his face trying to see passed the harshness. Then, she saw her Inuyasha as he face softened, but his frown deepened.

"Kagome, this is for the best. I can't have you here...distracting me. I have to stop him!"

Her eyes filled with tears.

"He will kill everyone and everything. I can't let that happen," he whispered.

"But..."

"Stop! I have Kikyo. She will help us," his voice was distant and his eyes back on the ground.

"Yasha...please..."

Her eyes snapped open as the memory of her own pathetic, pleading voice filled her mind. She had begged him to let her stay. She wanted to stay by his side like she promised, but he choose her...like always. She really hated him sometimes.

She sighed loudly as she sat up. Her body was stiff from being in bed for so long. She tried to blink away the burning sensation from her eyes, but only managed to noticed how puffy her eyes were. Her head was throbbing.

"Damnit," she mumbled.

"No need for that language," his deep voice filled her room.

She blinked up at him. When had he gotten there? Was he there before she woke up or did he just walk in? How did she not notice? With each question her frustration with him grew.

"How early is it?" She snapped.

"It isn't. You have over slept."

"How long have you been there allowing me to oversleep?"

His eyes narrowed, "Up. Now."

She growled softly at him, but did as she was told. She felt sore and stiff, but oddly energized. Her body seemed eager to finally be up and moving again. She did her best to stretch as she followed Sesshomaru out of her room. She focused on his back as she blindly followed him. Her mind was too occupied to pay attention to her surroundings.

Sesshomaru almost sighed when he felt her walk into his back. He turned his head to look over his shoulder at her. She was rubbing her nose and glaring at him with a red face.

"As if it is my fault you are not paying attention."

"Whatever," she grumbled under her breath.

He pulled the doors open and entered his small dojo. Kagome stepped into the room and moved around him to look around the room. It was a little bigger than her living room. The walls and floor were made of a light wood. There were two white mats on the floor and two windows letting fresh air in. There was nothing else in the room. She gave the room one more once over before turning to Sesshomaru.

"The weapons?"

He scoffed, "I would never put a weapon in your hands."

She turned red as she shouted, "Hey!"

Ignoring her, he continued, "You are here to learn to meditate. That will be the beginning of learning to control your power."

"I have my bow and arrows for that. I need to learn to fight," she tried to reason.

"Your power is you biggest strength. You offer the most as a miko on the battlefield, especially against Naraku," he reasoned patiently.

She took a calming breath, "Fine."

His eyebrow twitched as he noticed her tone. She lacked any respect. That would be dealt with later.

He pointed to one of the mats, "Sit."

She resisted stomping her foot and did as she was told. She plopped herself down. She looked up and watched as he gracefully stepped forward and sat down all in one fluid motion. Suddenly, she was acutely aware of her own pronounced lack of grace. In an effort to make up for her plopping down like a barbarian, her back suddenly went very straight and her shoulders back. As usual, Sesshomaru noticed this and held back a smirk.

"At least you know how to sit properly," he mused.

"Is that what I get to deal with all day?"

"If you continue to act like a child, yes."

"Wha...fine," she mumbled,

"Stop mumbling. I can still hear you," he snapped.

She sighed, but said nothing.

"Better. Now, simply place your hands on your knees and close your eyes."

She did as she was told, but couldn't help speaking.

"I am not good at this...Keade tried."

"Do not compare me to that old woman."

"You don't have to be so rude," she snapped as her eyes opened and she leaned forward into his face.

"You need to stop talking," he snapped back.

She sat back as he snapped at her and closed her mouth.

"Now, focus on the sounds around you."

She sat quietly for a moment, but couldn't focus. She had a million thoughts racing through her mind. She was trying so hard to get rid of them that she couldn't even sort them out. Suddenly, she was acutely aware of an itchy spot on her head...and her back. Her eyebrows scrunched together as she tried harder to focus. She was becoming increasingly aware of how loud her breathing was getting.

"Enough!"

She yelped in surprise as her eyes sprang open and landed on Sesshomaru. Was he mad? Kagome almost couldn't believe it, but she was almost positive that she could see how annoyed he was by the look on his face. She assumed the man only had one face!

"How is that one person can be so loud when not speaking?"

Her face turned red and she opened her mouth to speak. However, his powerful hand shot up and silenced her.

"Stop. Focus on the air. Listen to the sound of the air going through the room," his voice was even, but he sounded slightly annoyed still.

She sighed loudly, but closed her eyes and did as she was told. It took her a moment to become quiet enough, but soon she could hear the wind blowing through the trees.

"The trees," she whispered.

He almost rolled his eyes. Even now! She just couldn't stop talking. She had to be the only person he knew that could only meditate by speaking. He decided he would just have to go with it for now.

"Follow the wind through the trees."

His smooth, deep voice bounced around her mind. She followed his voice back to the trees. She could hear the leaves shuffling, the grass swaying, and finally a wooden chime.

"A chime?" There was a note of humor in her voice.

This time he did roll his eyes before saying, "Yes, chimes. Now, follow it through the window."

She traced the sounds again until she heard the faint whispering of the wind passing through the window. Now, she could hear fabric shuffling. Finally, she could hear it in her ears and filling her mind. It filled every part of her mind and she felt such peace in the quietness of the sound. She wanted to live there in that silence. She found herself going to the quiet places in her memories.

She remembered a time her mother took her to the beach. The stayed until the sun set. There was no one around, but her and her mother. They sat in silence and listened to the waves. Then, she could remember her father's funeral, after everyone else had left, and she stood there trying to remember his smile and his scent. Suddenly, she was sitting under the Goshinboku, before she ever came to this time, and resting with her bare feet in the soft grass as the leaves sang her the song of the winds.

Something tugged at her mind as she was taken to another memory. She was sitting in the hot springs, the water warming her inside and out, with her resting on a rock. The person beside her was silent...the person beside her.

Sesshomaru watched as she finally fell into her meditation. Her entire body relaxed as she released a small sigh. Her eyebrows lifted slightly in the middle, her lips stayed slightly parted, and he could see her eyes fluttering beneath her eye lids. The wind tossed her hair and it swept across her back and over her shoulder while some went across her face. She didn't move to fix it.

He looked down at her tiny hands and noticed they were limp and resting on her knees. Her nails were short, clean, and seemed to be one uniform shape. He could see a small trace of hair on her knuckles and hands, but it was so slight. He followed the veins in her hands up her forearm where they disappeared. His eyes traveled up her well formed bicep to her slightly broad shoulder. She was oddly broad for a woman her size. His eyes continued to her slender neck and then he was looking once again at her serene face. Her shapely pink lips, her small round nose, her...no!

His spine went stone straight when he finally realized what he was doing. He was starring at her, but more than that he was observing her. He looked down at her hands again and frowned. They were so small, but seemed powerful. Those hands were what took him in. Damn hands.

He was so distracted that he didn't even notice she was disturbed until...

"Oh," a small breath escaped her.

His eyes snapped back to attention and he was almost surprised to find her eyes open.

"You are not done."

"Sango!"

"The slayer?"

"Shippo! Miroku! Where are my friends!?"

He watched as panic slowly set in. Her body was tense as she leaned toward him. Her eyes were wild with worry and fear, but also hope. How had she not already asked about them?

"You are just now asking," he spoke evenly.

Apparently, that was not the right thing to say. She flew towards him onto her hands and leaned into his personal space. He looked down and noticed her legs were still somewhat crossed as she propped herself up on her hands and knees. However, her angry voice brought his eyes back to her face.

"Tell me! Please!"

She was so close to him; too close. He could smell everything on her. He could feel her hair brushing against him and her breath on his face.

"I do not know," his voice was flat and even, but his eyes never left her eyes.

"Oh...oh, no," she whispered.

"I do not believe they are dead."

He would never understand why he comforted her in the moment, but it didn't matter. He saw her body sag, slightly, in relief at the prospect of her friends possible being alive.

"They weren't there?"

"No. Naraku, as usual, had very convenient timing."

Kagome tried not to look at him. Her heart went from pounding to sinking in seconds. She couldn't even imagein what it had been like for Inuyasha. He had to face Naraku alone. All he had was Kikyo who didn't seem like the most comforting company. They weren't there. She wasn't there. She closed her eyes to keep the tears at bay.

Her efforts were worthless. Sesshomaru could smell the salt in the air. He was surprised she was trying to hide it. She seemed like such an open girl.

"May I go?" She asked through clenched teeth.

"Hn."

She didn't wait for another word. She was up on her feet and out the door in seconds. She needed to get to outside. She followed the wind back outside.

Sesshomaru stood to his feet and walked to the window. He watched as she ran frantically into the yard and barely had time to put her hands out before her legs gave out. He could only assume it was emotional exhaustion more than physical. She leaned on her hands and knees trying to catch her breath. Her hair was fanned all around her face hiding it from his view. He watched as her body desperately tried to calm itself down.

Finally, she seemed to find her breath again. Slowly, she lowered her forehead to the grass and breathed in the earth. She felt the cold softness of the grass against her face and took a long, deep breath. There was hope.

Sesshomaru watched her repeat the process of her calming breaths. Her entire body seemed to collapse. She leaned back and rested on her knees with her hands still on the ground in front of her. However, she didn't move to rest her head on her hands. Instead, she choose to keep her forehead rested in the grass. It almost looked like she was bowing, but he knew better. She was doing more than bowing. She was sending a prayer. The moment he thought it he heard her words.

"Please, please be alive. I will find you. I will make this better. I just need you to be okay. Please, God let them be okay...I need them," her voice cracked.

He found himself leaning into the window. He wanted to hear what desperation and love sounded like. These were pathetic and useless emotions, but he found himself curious.

She took another breath, then began, "I can make this better. I will. I just need them to do it. I will find them. They were not lost."

He watched as she slowly sat up. Her back rounded up until it was straight followed by her shoulders. Her hands slide from the earth to her thighs. Her head was still bowed and her hair was a black curtain. She took a few more steady breaths, then she looked up. Her hair fell away from her face and revealed something somewhat surprising. Her eyes were set with hope and determination. There was sadness there, but fight in her shined brightest through her expressive orbs. He noticed her jaw was tense and her lips set in a thin determined line. She would not be stopped. Humans often had a tendency to be rather stubborn.

"Interesting," he mused aloud.

Then, he turned on his heel and left the room. It would seem training would have to wait another day. He tried not to sigh as he thought of the time wasted today and how little of it they had left to waste this way. He was annoyed, but not surprised. Humans had a way of wasting what precious time they had in their short lives. He turned down a hall and headed for the courtyard.

Suddenly, he heard feet pounding on the wood. He could hear her before he could even smell. That would be their first priority in training; stealth. He turned just in time to see her turning a corner. He watched as she looked left then right. Her eyes lit when she saw him. There was a youthful glow in her eyes. He made no move as she ran up to him.

Then, breathlessly she said, "Where are you going?"

"Excuse me?"

She hunched forward slightly and took a few deep breaths. She was rather fast for a human, but clearly out of shape.

"How is it that you are so lazy?"

"Shut. Up!"

He choose not to respond to her disrespect. There was no one here to witness it. He waited as she caught her breath and stood back up. She stilled herself and looked him right in the eyes.

"My training isn't over yet, is it?" she said stubbornly as she planted her hands on her hips.

He tilted his head at her and looked her up and down. She was obviously tired and emotioinally drained, but there was something there that wasn't before. He turned and allowed her to follow him.

Now, he was surprised.

**Author's Note:** sorry it took so long. I am a little lost right now...not really sure what to do next. I know what I want to do here, but Im trying to feel my way there. Its all about the details and the journey after all!

I really hope you guys loved it. reviews would be appreciated, obviously. Thank you to everyone who has followed or favorited! I will try not disappoint you!

For all my Bittersweet Fate lovers! I am working on a sequel. I will say prepare yourself for some heartache lol big shocker there! BUT don't get your hopes up anytime soon. Much like season 4 of Sherlock, this might take awhile lol


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 - **A New Player 

He didn't know what to think of her. He walked through his lands, or what was left of them, and breathed in the fresh air. He could hear her following him from a distance. He could practically hear her body crashing through the wind. She was beyond loud. However, at the moment he wasn't disturbed by her noises. His mind was somewhat preoccupied these days.

She was following him slowly allowing her hands to trail over the tall grass. She wasn't sure where he was leading her, but she would enjoy the walk. She had always loved the beauty of this era. Everything was untouched and pure. Well, before Naraku. Her mind flashed back to what had become of Inuyasha's forest. Kagome didn't even want to see what else Naraku had managed to do to this beautiful time.

He heard her sigh and turned to look at her over his shoulder. Her fingers were playing with the grass. His eyes narrowed at her fingers. Her long, strong digits were dancing through the grass and flowers with surprising grace. Perhaps, she was a musician.

He scoffed at the idea.

"Keep up."

She looked at him for a split second before ignoring him. Her eyes went back to the grass and a small smile danced across her lips. Their training had gone surprisingly well. True to his word he didn't let her touch a single weapon. She didn't physically do much of anything. She still woke up feeling exhausted. However, Mr. High and Mighty, came waltzing into her room the second she was about to go back to sleep. His deep voice made her want to sleep even more.

Now, she looked at his back as he led her to the edge of his lands. His gait was smooth and strong, but he seemed to be taking his time a little more than usual. She had no idea where he was leading her, but it had something to do with Naraku. She knew it had something to do with what she asked him over breakfast.

"So, what is your beef with Naraku?" She asked.

Sesshomaru stopped mid-sip as his eyes found her face from across the small table.

"Excuse me?"

Kagome sighed and set down her chopsticks. She sometimes hated the fact that these people knew nothing about the future.

"Why do you want to help me kill him?"

And to that he said nothing. He simply stood and told her to follow him. Now, they were walking through open fields with his home slowly fading into the background. The wind was playing with the ends of his hair and she couldn't help, but smile. She used to watched Inuyasha's hair dance. Her heart clenched in her chest. She tried to blink away the tears as fast as possible, but she could tell by his stiffening shoulders that Sesshomaru could smell her tears.

He refused to look back at her. She would take care of her emotions without his help. They were closing in on what he needed her to see. He knew she would cry, but he wouldn't mind as much. She needed to know he was committed to killing Naraku and he needed her to be just as committed. Also, he knew that someone should mourn for his loss.

Kagome squeezed her eyes shut as tightly as she could. She pushed the tears back, but what she opened her eyes to made her want to close them again.

His former home was in ruins. Everything was black and gray. They were walking towards scorched earth that showed no signs of repairing itself. He could see the foundation on which his home was once built. He could still smell the death; the fire and Naraku.

"Wha...what is this?"

"This used to be my home," his voice was even.

Kagome couldn't take her eyes away from the destruction. She could see a few more structures in the distance that were slightly better off than his home, but that wasn't saying much. As far as her eye could see there was destruction.

"What happened?" She whispered in awe of the utter destruction.

"Naraku. He attacked while I was away. He killed almost everyone," one would think that he was discussing the weather.

Kagome couldn't help, but flinch at his hardness. She couldn't help wondering if he even cared.

"When? It looks like the fires have only just gone out," she whispered.

He sighed, "His miasma was left behind. It is as if it has gone to the root of everything and killed it."

"Why wasn't that," she pointed behind her, "destroyed as well?"

"That was built after this happened."

Kagome had so many questions, but she didn't feel right asking anymore. She was foolish and selfish enough to assume that Sesshomaru had no place in the fight against Naraku. She never imagined that he could have just as much to hate Naraku for as her friends. As much to hate him for as her. She never would've thought that she would be in the same category as the rest of her friends. For the longest time she was fighting for them because Naraku had never truly wronged her personally. Now, things had changed. Not only did she have a dog in this fight, but so did Sesshomaru. However, she had to know exactly how determined he was. There was one question she HAD to ask.

"How many survived?"

He flinched. Of course she would ask that.

"Only what you see at my current home."

Her eyes went wide as she said, "I have only seen three different servants."

"There are two more in the kitchen and five soldiers."

Kagome's eyes went wider still, "How many were there before?"

"Two hundred workers. One hundred thousand soldiers."

Her heart pounded once hard, then stopped. He killed that many of Sesshomaru's people! How did he even get passed Sesshomaru? Her mind froze on that thought. There was no way he would've gotten around Sesshomaru so easily.

"Where were you?"

"Patrolling."

He didn't add "alone", but she knew.

She couldn't stand to ask anymore questions. Her heart ached when she realized that she hadn't seen Rin or Jaken around. Had she possibly been too wrapped up in her own pain to realize they were around somewhere. No. She knew better. Naraku would've killed them first. He would have only set out to kill those two and everyone else would have been just for the hell of it.

She looked up at his stiff posture and tense shoulders. He wouldn't look at her. Did he really feel the loss? How could he not? But, he was Sesshomaru. Kagome didn't even know what to feel for him because she couldn't even guess at what he was feeling. However, her heart mourned for all the lost people and for those who survived.

"This is my," he paused as he thought of her odd wording, "beef."

Any other day Kagome would have laughed at hearing her future lingo rolling of his tongue. However, at the moment she could only stare at the ruins of his life. She sighed.

"I get it."

They both stood there looking at the destruction. Kagome almost jumped out of her skin when he started talking again.

"We started rebuilding once we finished burying the dead. We made it smaller; easier to protect. He went into hiding before I could find him. My men and I have not been able to locate him since. Then, Inuyasha."

She sucked in a breath and held it.

"That fool."

She released her breath thankful that he didn't go into detail.

"How long ago did this happen?"

"One year has not yet passed."

"So, after I left."

"I did not know you were gone until after I discovered Inuyasha's fate."

"You mean you didn't care until after this happened."

"Exactly."

She really hated Inuyasha. She thought she hated him for making her leave before, but now she hated so much more. There was only one reason why Sesshomaru would leave his newly destroyed land and come to Inuyasha's part of the world.

Kagome sighed, "You were looking for an alliance against Naraku and instead you found..."

"Exactly," he cut her off.

She turned to him and waited until he looked at her. His face gave her nothing. How could anyone look so void when discussing their own personal tragedy. Honestly, if nothing else his pride should be hurt, but he just stood there waiting for her to speak.

"I am sorry...for your loss," her voice was soft, but full of compassion and something he couldn't place.

"Hn," was his only response before he turned and led her back to his current home.

…...

She sat in her room starring into the darkness. The rest of the day had gone by slowly. Sesshomaru didn't say anything about training and she didn't ask. They both simply went their separate ways for the day. She was becoming increasingly aware of how disgusting her clothes were getting. However, a knock interrupted her thoughts on the subject.

"Umm, yes?"

A small youkai opened the door. She was a dark caramel color, her eyes were honey brown, and she had an oddly small nose and lips. Her dark hair was short and choppy, but not unruly. Kagome didn't think that Sesshomaru would allow "unruly" in his home. She seemed as if she would only come to Kagome's shoulders, but Kagome knew she was an adult.

"My Lord told me to bring you this for dinner," her voice was soft and high.

Kagome looked at her hands and almost laughed when she saw that she was holding a change of clothes. She jumped up from her bed and went to grab the clothing, but pulled back when she noticed the woman tense.

"I'm sorry..."

"Here."

Kagome tried not to flinch as she woman set the clothes on the floor, stepped out of the room, and slammed the door back into place. She had no idea what just happened, but she was fairly certain it was her fault.

She stood still for a moment, but then with a long sigh stripped off her clothes. She picked up the light kimono and let the soft clean fabric slide over her body. She adjusted everything just in time for Sesshomaru to open her door. She squeaked in surprise as he barged in on her.

She leveled him with a glare, "I know it's your house, but can you at least give warning."

"Why? As you stated, it is my home."

"I could've been naked!"

He resisted the urge to smile, "And that would've bothered me?"

Her mouth open and closed like a fish as her cheeks exploded into red. She was speechless. Sesshomaru couldn't help, but wonder what else he could do to make this happen. He decided now was not the time for this.

"It is time for dinner."

He turned and left without another word. Kagome didn't know what to say. She just followed him dumbly. Was he just joking with her? Perhaps, Sesshomaru was experiencing some sort of emotional distress, or disorder, because of what happened. It was easier to accept that instead of the possibility that Sesshomaru actually had a sense of humor.

He took his seat at the table and waited for her to do the same. He almost rolled his eyes at the apprehensive look she was giving him. He watched as Kia came in and served their food. He did not miss the odd look she gave Kagome. He would ask about that later.

Kagome poured tea for each of them out of habit. She didn't even notice when Sesshomaru went to grab the tea, but stopped a second before touching her hand. She missed the odd look of almost surprise he gave her. She missed it all as she began eating.

Sesshomaru looked at her hard. Why was she serving him and why did it bother him? He decided to move on from the small act. Now, was not the time for such meaningless thoughts.

"We will resume training tomorrow."

she looked up in surprise as she sipped her tea. She quickly swallowed and nodded her head with a small "okay". Then, she thought maybe he was bipolar. One minute he was teasing and the next he was stone again. Suddenly, she was very aware that she was starring at him. She cleared her throat and her eyes quickly found her plate again.They both sat in awkward silence as Kagome did her best to count every grain of rice left in her bowl. Dinner couldn't have ended soon enough.

Sesshomaru watched as Kagome did her best impression of a deer. She looked up at him with wide eyes, mumbled something resembling a "good-night" and practically ran from the room. Perhaps deer was not the right animal. The woman was simply not that graceful. He placed his elbow on the table and leaned his chin into his hand.

She was an odd woman. She had every right to be rather confident. She was beautiful, as far as humans were concerned, even he had to admit that. She was already powerful even with so much power left to realized. Also, she made it rather obvious that she cared very little what people thought of her. Yet, when confronted with the smallest teasing she was reduced to a child. Perhaps she was confident until confronted with the opposite sex. He knew he was attractive, but he never thought it would affect a woman like her. In fact, she had proven rather immune to his charm in the past. What was different now?

He sighed and turned his eyes to the doorway as Kia walked in. She paused, quickly bowed, then kneeled in front of him.

"Yes."

"She is powerful."

"I noticed," his tone was slightly annoyed.

Kia sighed, "Too powerful."

At that he straightened up and tilted his head, "Come out with it."

Kia looked at her hands, but answered, "I do not trust a miko with that much power."

"It does not matter who you trust. It only matters who I trust."

Kia lowered her head further and nodded, "of course."

"At any rate, this has nothing to do with trust. I can control her and that is all that matters. We need her, unfortunately, to defeat him."

"Why?"

"I cannot purify him. She can."

Then, she looked up and Sesshomaru noticed something very pronounced in her eyes: fear. Kia was the youngest daughter of his most trusted general. After Naraku attacked, she was one of the only ones left. It would seem her father taught her how to survive. When all was said and done, Sesshomaru found her under a pile of dead bodies, with barely a pulse, but not a scratch on her. She didn't speak for six months, but she got her work done. She was young, but she was wise and highly skilled. Although, mice youkai often had impressive survival skills, she seemed a mark above the rest. However, he knew that in regards to Kagome her instincts were off.

"She will not harm anyone under my protection. She is good to a fault at times."

Kia settled, but still her fear lingered. Sesshomaru could smell it on her and he couldn't stand it. She was a powerful youkai, and although she was young, she could survive anything. He would not have one of his own acting like a coward.

"Enough. You are above this fear. Behave accordingly."

Kia looked at him in shock and hurt. Her father had always told her he was a cold, but fair man. However, at that moment all she saw was cold. He stood, without a second glance, and left the room. She cleaned the room with shaking hands and went to bed. He saved her. He took her in and protected her. That was all she could and would ever expect from him. She was lucky for that much.

He walked away from her and the memories she stirred. Those eyes. He could imagine Rin wearing those eyes...he stopped the thought before it could go too far. He refused to be so pathetic. Kia was alive. She would live a life worthy of being saved in the first place.

He turned down the hall and set his feet toward his room. He looked across the courtyard expecting to see a dark room, but instead he saw a light. Her door was open and oddly enough she was sitting just inside her room starring at him. He had certainly not expected that.

"What are you doing?"

"I was just thinking," her voice was calm.

"Well, do so quickly. You will wake up early tomorrow."

She sighed, "Must you always be such a jerk."

He turned fully toward her, "Must you always be so disrespectful."

"I'm serious," her anger was slowly leaking into her voice.

"I'm sure, but honestly my brother hardly warrants so much thought," his voice was even and bored.

Her eyes went wide, "Excuse me?"

"I can only assume you have always spent an inordinate amount of time thinking of that fool. I am sure that has only multiplied now that he is dead."

Her face turned red with anger, "You are so mean."

"I do not care."

"Well, that much is obvious," she spat.

His eyes narrowed, "Meaning?"

She ignored the dangerous edge of his voice, "You could care less about anything. You don't give a damn your brother is dead. You don't give a damn your home was destroyed and all those people murdered. You don't give a damn that little..." she was soundly cut off by a hand around her throat.

There was a small part of her mind that told her to panic and an even smaller part that wondered how he got in front of her so fast. However, all those instincts were pushed aside by the look in his eyes. She was always ruled by her illogical emotions and at that moment her sympathy took over. What unfortunate timing!

He was angry. No, he was irate. His eyes were narrowed to slits and there was a silent snarl on his face. She regretted her words as she looked into his face and realized that this was not a man who did not give a damn.

"You WILL watch your mouth, wench. You have no idea who I am. I do not need to walk around like a pathetic fool; whimpering in self pity and reeking of sadness," his hot angry breath covered her face.

She was becoming increasingly aware of her lack of oxygen. Her hands came up to grab his hands. She opened her mouth, but nothing came out. It was then she noticed her feet were no longer touching the ground. One leg dangled uselessly while the other bent at the knee and rested awkwardly on his hip.

"Your tears will accomplish nothing you pathetic bitch. Your sadness will not bring him back. Your disgusting emotion will do absolutely nothing for anyone; dead or alive."

She was starting to fade into darkness, but she could still feel his solid body against her. She could feel his breath on her face. She could feel her leg sliding down his body as her leg went limp along with the other one. She could feel how close he was as his lips got closer and closer to her ear.

"If you dare speak of," he couldn't say her name, but he continued, "I will kill you."

She heard the threat and understood that it was a promise. She barely got a nod out before he dropped her. The moment her feet touched the ground her legs gave and she collapsed onto her hands and knees. One hand came up to rub her abused neck and she gulped down air.

"This night simply refuses to end," he growled.

Kagome looked up at him wondering if what she said really affected him that greatly. She couldn't understand why she was even willing to look up at him. She wasn't afraid he would kill her, but she was curious to know if he was done. She couldn't help, but wonder what the hell was wrong with her. However, when she found his face she saw him looking elsewhere. She followed his eyes to the front gates. Then, she understood.

"Kagura," her voice was raspy and weak.

She was bleeding and naked. Her hair was wild and filthy. Her eyes were terrified and exhausted. She seemed like she was ready collapse right where she stood.

"Please," her weak voice only reached Sesshomaru, "help me."

Sesshomaru was moments away from responding when he felt something sweep by him. He was almost surprised to see Kagome hurtling herself off the platform into his garden. He watched as she crossed the courtyard and reached the front gates with rather impressive speed. Every muscle in her body was tense and propelling her forward. He couldn't see her face, but he found himself very curious as to what he would see there.

However, in the next moment he could guess what was on her face. She launched herself at Kagura fist first. He could hear something breaking under her fist. Kagura fell without protest. Kagome stood over her breathing like a wild animal.

"I'm going to kill you!" Her broken tormented scream filled the night air.

Sesshomaru's eyes went wide. He watched as she threw herself onto Kagura and wrapped her hands tightly around her neck. Perhaps he was wrong. Perhaps these emotions of hers could get things done.

"Kagome, please," Kagura whimpered.

Kagome's face was distorted with anger and pain. She hated her. She hated anything and everything about Naraku. She would kill him and everything he ever created from his disgusting flesh. She tightened her hands around her throat. She felt tears streaming down her face and she saw them smearing the blood and filth on Kagura's face. She squeezed her neck tighter. She ignored every instinct yelling at her to stop. She ignored ever voice in her head telling her she was not a murderer.

"Please..." Kagura's voice barely made it out.

Kagome tried to stop her heart from aching. Then, she made the mistake of looking into her eyes. Her eyes were filled with fear, agony, and something so broken that Kagome couldn't stand it. She couldn't stand it because she had seen that damn look so many times before. She couldn't ignore the voices in her head anymore. She couldn't ignore that voice telling her she was not Naraku.

"DAMNIT!" Her tormented scream once again filled the atmosphere around him.

Sesshomaru grimaced at the volume. He watched as she released Kagura's neck and practically threw her head into the ground. There she sat straddling her naked, weak enemy and she couldn't kill her. Honestly, the woman was practically already dead! As if that wasn't bad enough, now the fool was sobbing again. He growled to himself as he made his way to the mess unfolding in front of his home.

No, it would seem he was right. That woman's damn emotions were a worthless hindrance.

**Author's Note:** ALRIGHT! I am sorry I took so long, but everyone should know now that this is going to be a slow SLOW process for me. I really hope you like it. Review and let me know.

I love everyone for favoriting and following! You are beautiful.

Also, I don't know why Sesshomaru always ends up physical abusing Kagome. I in no way AT ALL condone domestic violence of any kind. It is just one of those things that happens only in these crazy fanfictions of mine. He is a dog lol


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